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Tuesday, April 27, 2010

I'm a "Magic Gathering" Superhero Wahooooo

Haaa!!!!

Jake tipped me off to this site lolololol:







"So the next time you're flipping through the contents of a Lorwyn booster and suddenly feel the jarring sensation of a planeswalker as your rare, take a moment to appreciate the flavor there. It's approximately the same emotion a Lorwyn boggart would feel, seeing the otherworldly Liliana staring back at him.




Liliana Vess








If Jace is teetering on edge of the moral abyss, Liliana is careening into the howling void after taking a swan dive right over the safety railing. Liliana has made some... arrangements, and the cost of those arrangements will be high. Is that fun and cryptic? Cryptic yes, fun no? You're saying I'm basically just restating parts of her bio from the planeswalker minisite, where it mentions she "made a dark deal with ancient, sinister forces"? You're right. Let's get down to brass tacks here.

Demons.

They were demons.

Liliana made a deal with some demons, and now she's got the bod and vigor of a young woman for a long, long time.

Also, incredible power.

See, the thing about necromancy is, it gets you into creepy circles kind of right off the bat. You deal in dead things and fraternize with creatures from abyssal hell-dimensions. By the time you've spent your life becoming an accomplished necromancer, like Liliana, you've got a Blackberry full of seedy underworld contacts ("underworld" not in the "crime-ridden streets" sense, but in the literal "place where demons live" sense). These unsavory characters are willing to offer you just about anything, as long as you're willing to sign their contract using a regulation bloody quill. (Blood not included. Some assembly required. Note: contract not made from wood pulp—those with allergies to exotic animal dander should seek a pathophysiologist and/or exorcist after signing.)

It's not even clear how long ago Liliana finally took her demonic contacts up on their offer. How many years did her pact undo? Decades. So Liliana has the taut beauty of a young woman, and the craft and experience of an entire lifetime. Rather than face the consequences of age and death, she pushed the reset button.

Thing is, that's only going to bring a different set of consequences. The multiverse has infinite possibilities, yet a free lunch still isn't one of them. Liliana is in the debt of demons, and they aren't known for being forgiving creditors.

She's got plans to deal with them (what, did you think a black mage expected to play fair?), and in the meantime, she's having the time of her life. Liliana gave the Grim Reaper the finger and lived to sneer about it. But still, there's a nagging note of panic behind her thoughts—an edge of doubt about her ability to handle the terms of her contract, threatening to slice through into her conscious mind.

Every demon knows: everybody expects to get away with it."

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