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Thursday, May 03, 2007

Newsletter Issue 8: The Concept of "Selling Out", "The Secret", Polygamous Relationships, How To Keep Fit, How Old Are You? The Numbers Debate,....

Newsletter Issue 8: Book Project Update and The Concept of "Selling out", "The Secret"......

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".....TheAnomalyInfinite a.k.a Liliana Alam is a writer, model, artist, musician, athlete, inventor, philosopher, a genius, a visionary…. AI's unique method of doing everything, doing it with "The AI flavour" genius, and easily navigating between vast areas of expertise, makes her the first of her kind. A child prodigy hidden from the public eye, AI "did it all" by the age of 10. Now at 20 she's grown to being it all, and is now sharing her story with the world…. Witness the Rise of AI...... " -


A Very Long Newsletter 8 (Read The Sections Which Interest You) :

The Concept of "Selling Out", "The Secret", Polygamous Relationships, How To Keep Fit, How Old Are You? The Numbers Debate, "College Degree Vs. None" Discussions, Your Emails and My Responses


Visit my artworks slideshow on any of my websites, the official one being


Book Project Update and the concept of "Selling Out":

I've completed the 1st draft and printed out all 1400 pages of it. Now I can take it outside Yay! and edit it via hard copy as opposed to being on this macbook 17 hours a day. Oik.

My investor and team of advisers have suggested that perhaps I could split it up into 7/8 mini books to make it more understandable and readable. Like Harry Potter, Star Wars, or Lord of the Rings. I have thought about this idea and am still considering it. But the thing is, my project is all connected and I don't like putting it out in sections just for the sake of extra sales or "easierness". The bible is over 10,000 pages. It is best fully absorbed as it is, not in little segments. What is "easy" isn't always what is Best/most Effective. Segments are what TV shows are good for. (Which I eventually will make). And I intend this book project to be made into a movie which I will modify a screenplay for, direct, produce, and also star in. Everything is linked, and unless it is in full form, it is not a full representation of what messages I'm putting out into the biosphere. Tolkien (author of LOTR) also hated the idea his editor had, but he still came out with 3 books instead of 1 massive one. It is ironic, this conflict of ideals within the business world with art. For a long time I refused to let anyone see my work, because I didn't want to sell it or have it be commercialized in any way. Haha many of you "artists" out there I'm sure feel me on that. But also I find this mentality a bit closed-minded. The "sell-out" concept is far too simplistic. If Einstein never published his theories, modern science and medicine would not be benefiting from his mind. If Shakespeare became a hermit and hid his work from everyone, high schools would be at loss with What The Hell Are We Gonna Do A Play About Now? If Martin Luther King decided to keep his "I have a dream" notion to himself, the fight for racial equality would not have been so successful. If J.K Rowling decided to keep Harry Potter locked in her mind, or R.L Stein didn't publish Goosebumps, millions of school children worldwide would have lost the interest to read. If Benjamin Franklin decided to keep his invention to himself, we wouldn't have light to illuminate our dark nights. If Bill Gates kept Microsoft to himself, and Steve Jobbs kept Apple to himself, none of you would be able to read emails, save time by typing vs. handwriting, or browse through the monumental free search information network: the internet. Now I see the whole bohemian fear of "Selling Out" from a different perspective. If I publish it, a bigger audience will be able to see, benefit, and enjoy my ideas and inventions. Before I did my work for myself alone, and now I also do it for others who find faith and inspiration from my work. As Nelly Furtado has said in her

song "On The Radio (Remember The Days)"

You liked me till' you heard my shit on the radio
Well I hate to say but pop aint' going solo
You liked me till' you heard my shit on the radio
But now I'm just too mainstream for you, oh no
You liked me till' you seen me on your t.v.
Well if you're so low below then why you watching
You say good things come to those who wait
Well I've been waiting a long time for it

I remember the days when I was so eager to satisfy you
And be less then I was just to prove I could walk beside you
Now that I've flown away I see you've chosen to stay behind me
And still you curse the day I decided to stay true to myself

You say your quest is to bring it higher
Well I never seen change without a fire
But from your mouth I have seen a lot of burning
But underneath I think it's a lot of yearning
Your face, the colours change from green to yellow
To the point where you can't even say hello
You tell me you'd kill me if I ever snob you out
Like that's what you'd expect from me, like that's what I'm about


It's so much easier to stay down there guaranteeing you're cool
Than to sit up here exposing myself trying to break through
Than to burn in the spotlight, turn in the spitfire
Scream without making a sound, be up here and not look down
because we're all afraid of heights


Why ya hurt me hurt me hurt me hurt me hurt me hurt me so so,
leave me down down down down low leave me down da down down da down da down down down...shit on the radio... shit on the radio... shit on the radio... shit on the radio"

Jennifer Lopez's wise words, "don't be fooled by the rocks that I got. I'm still Jenny From The Block." and Will.i.Am of the Black Eyed Peas "Celebrity-Shmembrity. It don't mean nothin. What matters is your heart."

"When you're rich, people don't view you as weird. They see you as Eccentric."

Well people, my dear readers...

I'm rich.

I can use myself as proof of how a dreamer can succeed, as I have achieved much of my dreams despite the odds and people's doubts. I used historical examples to back up my case while I was working hard to achieve my goals and would have liked support and belief from people and my family, but nobody listened. Only now, they are all turning their heads and smiling for me, saying that they are "proud" of me. When all I heard growing up was how much of a failure I was (not based on my achievements, but simply because I was different, and because I didn't do the things that most other kids did). Regardless, I succeeded. And I haven't stopped. I will keep going, keep dreaming, keep achieving, and keep believing and helping in my visions and those of others. And Yes, I am one in a million, I am one of those examples who made it out of incredible odds against them. I graduated high school in 3 years, ahead of my class. I was offered to do a PhD at age 19. I have 3 agencies which sponsor my various acting, modeling, and art pursuits. I make more money in 1 hour than most people make in a week. I have found infinite love. I have done more than most have done in a lifetime. I will be CEO of the greatest company ever to be created by age 25. I am "special" . I am what is considered a genius, an exception to the rule. But before all this, I was Always Doubted. You can do what I do, and what others have done.

Success Stories:

Bill Gates. (a college drop-out) -inventor of Microsoft
Richard Branson (no college degree) - CEO of Virgin Records
Robert Kiyosaki (degree, but unemployed for 9 years before he became rich) - Inventor of "Cashflow: The Game", Author of "Rich Dad Poor Dad"

Committed relationships open to polygamy.
Monogamy is One-Dimensional.

That's it. I'll write on this in my next issue. Stay tuned.


The Secret (Recently one of the co-authors of this book which has sold 1.6 million copies since December 2006), was on Campbell Live, a New Zealand Talk/News show. The dynamic between John Campbell and the metaphysicist/spiritual healer was not effective in answering questions either side of an argument would have. The metaphysicist was unable to be in the mentality of Mr. Campbell, consequently the majority populace. It was like watching one person question someone in French, and get a response back in Japanese.

I have been explaining points found in the secret to people since I was 10, far before The Secret was officially released, far before I ever heard of what it was, or how to even describe what I knew. And this information, isn't privy to only me. It has been around as long as the universe existed. Whatever form it comes thru, whether thru the Bible, the Quran, Martin Luther King, Ghandi, Mother Theresa, Richard Branson, Britney Spears (yes Britney Spears), Michael Jackson, Kahlil Gibran, Kazi Nazrul Islam, Herman Hesse, Nietzsche, so many others, the message has been around for Eons. That You Can Do Whatever You Dream. I'm glad The Secret has come out. And I'm glad that people have responded to it. It will greatly help the audience market for my book, release date this year 2007. As my book, covers many topics and similar things which The Secret describes. But my book, in addition, has a mega-load of information which takes The Secret to a whole new level. My book is not The Secret. But if you liked The Secret, you'll like my book. My book has 100 "The Secret's in it. Plus artworks, poetry, scientific calculations, theories, answers to pretty much Every Area of Life. From the normal, like, Family, Friends, Love Advice, to "so.....was it the chicken....or the egg??" to "what is the best recipe for food which tastes good, is gourmet, and I can cook in less than 15 mins. ?" More , much more, my dear people, is in my book. Enough of That for now, you'll all read it soon enough. Now.... back to "The Secret"...

I hope to enlighten some points on "The Secret" in what follows:

Ok, so basically what The Secret is about is, you can do whatever you want, have whatever you want, and no matter how broke you are or how horrible of a circumstance you are in, you can "think" your way thru it, and create the life you imagine. You are the Sole Master of Your Destiny, of Your Life, of Everything and Anything that happens to you. Because there is nothing which "happens" to you. You are the one who Makes these things happen, through your subconscious and conscious thoughts.

To all the skeptics, or for anyone who finds this concept a bit too idealistic or just plain weird/hippyish to believe literally, I'll give some examples.

The Law Of Attraction: That whatever you think, will happen. That a Thought, becomes ... A Thing. A thought, becomes an Action.

You think about money, it will come to you.
But oppositely if you think you have money problems, thats exactly what will happen.

The Holocaust:

6 million people were gassed. Most people will say, ok, well they didn't ask for this, they didn't think "yes. please kill and torture me just because I'm a Jew".

Well.. heres the thing.

Why The Holocaust is such a monumental moment in history is because so many people died. And Death is Perceived as a Negative Thing. If you thought death was a Good Thing, you wouldn't think the Holocaust was a bad event.

For example, over 6 million new people are Born every day. Life, begins. But nobody celebrates or acknowledges that. People tend to pay attention to things that are negative more than things that are positive.

Now, another question arises, ok , but the Holocaust wasn't just bad because people died, it was bad also because of the Way which they died, and the reasons for Why they died.

Well that brings up two other points:


Reason and justice are both things which the human mind has invented. They don't exist. They are based on perception. Just because an Action happens, there is no natural law which makes it any one thing. A tree falls in the forest. Is that good or bad? Now, the same tree we just talked about has fallen on a beaver's nest, making it difficult for the beaver to gather food, and therefore survive. Now is the tree falling a "bad" thing? Think about it. Its the exact same action. A tree falls. Humans adapt things like consequence and judgment to actions in the world, which helps them to understand the otherwise extreme complexity which surrounds them. The universe is a very complex place. But further study of quantum physics will actually show you, that in its complexity, it is essentially Simple.

A tree Falls.
A leaf Blooms.
A person Dies.
A person Lives.
A person Kills another person.
A person Eats.

These are all actions.

What we think is "good" or "bad" is only our own arrogance and ignorance of the "bigger" picture.

A boy hits a grandma on her head and robs her wallet. The grandma's daughter avenges her by killing the boy. Is justice served? Some would say so. But the fact remains that all that happened was an Action-the boy robbing the grandma, and this Action is immediately labeled and judged as being either a "good" or "bad" thing. If it is a "bad" thing, the person who committed this "bad thing", must be punished. If the person does a "good" thing, they must be rewarded. Generally people want to pass judgment, because they feel it makes the world a safer and more peaceful place. Without law, there would be chaos, and so forth. And what decides what is law? Usually moral questions of what is right and wrong, good and bad. What is ineffective about this type of thinking is that instead of people genuinely wanting to live in a society where they love their fellow neighbor, they begin to do things because they feel forced to. In other words, a person will not steal, not because they believe it is Bad, but because it is Against the Law. This same mentality can be found in many devout biblical followers. That they begin to be nice to people because of a Fear of God, as opposed to a genuine Love of Man. I discussed this issue in my previous newsletter, which I received some interesting responses to. Scroll down to read the email exchange between Fred Stiplex and myself.



How do i keep my fit body? (And by the way... To see more photos of...My Body and Me...see my modeling portfolio slideshow on or any of my websites listed at the end of every newsletter and/or email I send to you.) One of my strengths in all that I do, for example: modeling, is my Versatility. I have been Every Look, Every "Type" and find great discovery in being a wide range of people and personalities in my shoots. I do my own makeup, hair, etc. as so far no artist can even come close to competing with me or measuring up to my standards. With Versatility, and Why I experiment with so many various physical appearances, It offers as H.Marko would say "a different perspective, like seeing through different colour lenses." How do all the different people in the world see it? And how do others see them? Spend 1 day as a skinny person, and 1 day as a fat person and you'll see the difference in how you are treated.

There's been suggestion for a Yeah. U Wish. I do, do artful style nudes and many experimental/extreme shoots but they won't be released to the public until a much later date of my journey. Some other fun stuff I might like to do would be: to be a Victoria's Secret Angel, be in Playboy, FHM, Vanity Fair, Artistic Nude Photography Magazines, Etc. For all business/ modeling/art/photography/etc. booking enquiries email

I eat whatever I want, whenever I want, but drink green tea, water, take fish oil (omega 3), b-vitamin complex, and I do at least 1 strenuous physical activity e.g something which makes me sweat profusely per day. (this can be anything from running, cycling, swimming, playing a sport, combat training, running around the apartment/house, jumping up and down while cooking, sit ups while watching tv, anything that works your body to the point where you feel nauseous. Make sure to go past your physical limitations. Don't stop when it hurts. Stop at least 10 minutes later. ) Sex is a supplement, not a substitute for exercise, so it doesn't count people!

With regards to eating, although I do eat whatever I want, I eat only when I'm hungry, and I don't overeat. I listen to my body, to my liver, to my stomach, and I sense the internal messages within myself. I eat bread, but I eat whole-grain, I used all types of fatty sauces, but every meal I eat is balanced. For example, I'll cook fried onions w/garlic (garlic is a natural carcinogen-meaning it prevents cancer, finely chop garlic right before you cook it must be fresh, then fry it in a pan w/olive oil as a first step to anything you do in the kitchen), a rich tomato sauce with a pesto and olive oil base, and I'll put in cream cheese, butter, and ranch dressing. But, I add lemon juice (this helps your body digest and decompress fatty acids and allows you to cleanse yourself of toxins which otherwise would be absorbed immediately and stored as Fat.) I eat bagels with cream cheese and butter, but I'll occasionally put on smoked salmon pieces (fish-omega oil-improves mental clarity, helps you lose weight, rids body of toxins-so you'll "poop") and tomato slices (tomatoes are an excellent source of all around vitamins. Whatever you're eating, pop a tomato or a sliced onion in there. You'll already be doing wonders for your body.) The key is always, for me, Balance. Not moderation, but Balance. Eat as much as you want, what you want, but balance it with something that is truly healthy for you. Mix a carrot into your daily milkshake smoothie. Drink 2 glasses of water for every soda. (Although I personally don't drink soda. I prefer plain old solid Water.) I know best, how my body works, and this method has worked for me to lose weight, to keep fit, and maintain a healthy fitness & strength level for all the things which I do, some of which include strenuous and extreme martial arts, dance, combat training, yoga, etc.

I also invented my own fitness programme, ( I lost 15 lbs. -ok i was never fat but at one point I wasn't totally fit either-, and toned my body thru this last year... a lot of very overweight people benefited from my program- think of a better version of Pilates in combination with Tae-bo) soon to be available on my website for the public.



Ok, so when you're born are you 0, or 1?

Yeah that is a confusing system , it could go endlessly in debate i guess.

i mean... the start of the universe, when is that? humans
don't even know when it started, and what is the definition of
"beginning"? is that when the first atom merged with another? or is
that just when "nothingness" became "something?", but what is
"something" and what is "nothing"?

And with birth, confusing, because, as the fetus forms, lets say the
term of embryo , already equates life, so technically, when i was
born, wouldn't that already make me 9 months old? and, if you
consider, that the actual conception which happened, the "Sex" already
started my life, and it takes about a month to develop, isn't THAT the
start of my life? but also, since i'm made from a mom and a dad, and they
are both a certain age, within sperm and egg, doesn't your age also
effect my age, collectively? i mean, if you look at the human race as
a whole, and consider genetic progression in that sense... the first
human was technically 9 months old.

but that was 4.5 billion years ago. so now... that means that we are
alll...AT LEAST.. 4.5 billion years old. Which would explain how much
smarter and taller, and etc. we are. Its not attributing to our
individual genetic history, rather a collective history, of our entire
human species. so those who have had large families, are the oldest,
and sometimes wisest, because wisdom is smartness, is progression
genetically speaking of the human species. ........


Two Debates on College Degree Vs. No College Degree in Life Security. E.g "good job, good family, good life, good money". Recently, this debate occurred between A-a dreamer and B-a person who lives in what is known as "the real world"

Dreamer A believes that security, great achievement, and riches can be achieved without a degree, and with belief in dreams. Person B disagrees, and aims to have a life full of happiness, but with realistic success in terms of a steady job, steady income, happy family, and savings enough to retire and be able to travel. Person B feels that Dreamer A lives in a fantasy world, and needs to be more logical and realistic. The people's names and personal details have been omitted for their security and protection. Both each An interesting conversation to say the least:

Enjoy! let me know what you all think:

CONVERSATION 1: Dreamer A, Person 1

Person 1: so junior. what have you achieved?"
including your failures and triumphs
cuz from where i'm standing ur broke

Dreamer A: but content

Person 1: i don't give a shit about your contentment. i need to know that you can support ur wife and your child
and not have to be on welfare
and can afford the luxuries in life

Dreamer A: your not your fucking clothes, or your car, or your MONEY

Person 1: don't u talk to me like that junior. u shut ur mouth. i'm your father.

Dreamer A: a MAN is only judged on how much he can achieve in this world

Person 1: u live in a fantasy world
what have u achieved junior?

Dreamer A: it's all a fantasy world

Person 1: no . You're the fantasy world
you and your ideas.
ha! ideas!
money doesn't come from ideas!
you'll be broke forever

Dreamer A: actually.....

Person 1: and i dont want to have an unhappy and broke son


Person 1: you shame the family boy

Dreamer A: MONEY IT SELF WAS AN idea

Person 1: yeah. i don't believe that. thats bullshit.
it doesn't matter what you say . you still have no income.
and a wife

Dreamer A: people have great ideas, that leads them to money and power

Person 1: yes, but how do they get there?
with degrees
and small steps
u talk about greatness, and u dont even have any money!

Dreamer A: e=mc2
a poor man came up with that

Person 1: if u haven't succeeded by this age, how will u be able to succeed in the future?
yes. and einstein died poor.
he never made that much money.
he was a genius. but a poor genius

Dreamer A: i would just be graduating college in a year rom now
if i went to college

Person 1: and thank god boy. that would mean u have a guaranteed job
and achieved nothing
people dont want to hire someone like u with great ideas and no degree
Dreamer A: i still have a guaranteed jiob

Person 1: yeah, doing what? janitor work?

Dreamer A: you can not get FIRED form the military

Person 1: i don't expect u you to do great things. i'm perfectly happpy with the basic things in life. i just need to know that my beloved son is taken care of.

Dreamer A; now, THAT"s job security

Person 1: the military is not a good job
that is dangerous son.

Dreamer A: it's better than most

Person 1: why can't u just go to college, and get a job, and buy a house?

Dreamer A: Yeah and waste away in a little office

Person 1: you don't waste away in an office
since you're such a genius, that should be easy for you

Dreamer A: doing a meaningless thing

Person 1: oh i see, so i'm a waste?
i love my job!
i have a happy life!
i make money


Person 1: and i have a good time
yes. i do.
as for you,
but have you lived your life?
you are what society calls a loser

Dreamer A: what do you mean have i lived my life?

Person 1: again, with your philosophy

Dreamer A: you can have all the money in the world, but it will not buy you experience or true love
or any such thing that is TRULY valuable
it will buy you NOTHING
that you can take with you

Person 1: yes. i have true love.
i am married.
i love my wife
and i can provide for her
which shows my care
you however, can't.
so how much do you really love your wife, as you can't provide for her?

Dreamer A: marriage is a partnershio
this is not the 50's

Person 1: yes. based on real things.
we provide for each other
my wife has a career too. but it is my responsibility as a man, to provide.
she provides too.
i agree with you about partnership
but, we both are college graduates
we have Guaranteed jobs for the rest of our lives!
you don't!
even with all of your big ideas!

Dreamer A: will they ask you how many degrees you have when you die?

Person 1: no. but they will when i live.
and actually you're being contradictive.
first you say a man is measured by what he achieves

Dreamer A: yes

Person 1: then you blame me for having actually having measurable achievements

like ..A Degree

Person 1: please watch your tone

Dreamer A: what he achieves in life

Person 1: That "bullshit paperwork",

Dreamer A; how he raises his children

Person 1: provides me this computer,
which i can talk to you with

Dreamer A: how he treats his fellow man

Person 1: it pays rent,
it pays mortgage,
it pays for my wife's cosmetic things, and what she likes
it pays for my car

Dreamer A: and thats the endless RAT race

Person 1: it pays for my spirituality and my vacations
i agree with you about the rat race. i have seen this, and i live in this.
i do wish there was a way i could not have to be in it.
but i live in the Real World.

Dreamer A: that's a shame
doing the SAME thing everyday

Person 1: you can dream, but i know how reality works
it is great that you dream.

Dreamer A: it must tedious

Person 1: but i only wish that you have some income to provide for yourself to sustain your creative lifestyle
i like my life.
i have an income
just because i do the same thing every day doesn't mean it is boring for me.
it pays rent and the bills
I like what I do.
what is your income?
your actual income
after taxes

Dreamer A: unemployment
1400 a month
that's more that what most people make

Person 1: ah i see. so you use taxpayers money, people who actually WORK hard for a living, to fund your "ideas"
that is a horrible thing
you are using people like me,
to live.
you are a parasite of society

Dreamer A: I EARNED that money
how have you earned that money?
4 years in the military

Person 1: where do you think welfare comes from little boy?

Dreamer Al i paid more taxes than most people

Person 1: It comes from My pocket!

Dreamer A: i call it my severance pay

Person 1: I am a grown man. I am your father. And your disrespect for me is appalling.

Dreamer A: YOUR RICH

Person I: I raised you and fed you and loved you.

you were never there dad
so quit with the bullshit
i became a man all by my self

Person 1: I was very well there. I may not have given you all of my time, because I was busy Working, to provide for you.

Dreamer A: without your help

Person 1: I show my love in practical ways
not with these emails which you send to me

Dreamer A: cars and clothes

Person 1: A Man?

Dreamer A: yeah

Person 1: you call yourself a man?
You are a boy

Dreamer A: i've accomplished more things than any man twice my age
i grew up and matured
and not by choice
only be necessity

Person 1: Oh wow. yes, that is good. I do agree. I have learned a lot from you. I can see you are very intelligent, bright, passionate, and a nice person.
But you are still living like a child.
With all your maturity, you still have no steady security
Do you understand what I am telling you boy?

Dreamer A: yeah

Person 1: What is it that you've "accomplished"?

Dreamer: but i'll manage

Person 1: i haven't seen any of these accomplishments
Son! I dont want you to "manage"!
I want you to be able to afford the things you like, and live a happy, good , life!
you are my son!
I love you!

Dreamer A: there is nothing easy in this life

Person 1: And what worries me also, is that, if you don't succeed, you will come running back to me.
And I am not a very rich person.
it all requires hard work and sacrifice
I have money, and I work hard for it.

Dreamer A: and at the end it will all pay off

Person 1: But if you fail, son, life doesn't always become what we plan. What happens if you fail?
You'll ask me for help!
And I may not be able to give it to you
I will want to, but son I am not a rich man.
I am a hard-working, honest person who wants to be happy

Dreamer A: that's why i never really plan. I just go and do it.

Person 1: Why do you have to make it so hard for yourself?
You have everything it takes to have many doors open to you
I am trying to understand and accept you,
because it is necessary
but why do you need to do things this hard way
why don't you go to college?
please. just for me.

Dreamer A: i do NOT want he easy route
Person 1: only 4 years.
and then you're free!

Dreamer A: that's what your dad says?

Person 1: you know your grandfather was a strong man. But I went to college for myself.
I came from a very poor background.
You know that.
I made my way through working hard.
Not dreaming like you do.
why, when you have this amazing opportunity, which so many would love, why are you not taking it?
you could get a degree, people will understand what you are saying then.

Dreamer A: people will understand soon enough

Person 1: Son. Honestly. tell me, how are your finances
You have said that I wasn't there for you. But I was son. You were always loved. You chose this way for yourself. It could have been easier for you.

Dreamer A: easy is not the way
i don't want things handed to me on a silver platter and not know what sacrifice and hard work and long hours are
i wanna be one of the "people"
i wanna know what they go through
THAT makes a great leader

Person 1: Why?
why do you want these things?

Dreamer A: a leader for the people

Person 1: i dont expect them of you
nobody expects this from you

Dreamer A; like King Arthur

Person 1: just be a good person !

Dreamer A; i'm already a good person

Person 1: well, we could talk all day about historical examples. but those cases are one in a million.
you are not King Arthur
And you don't have to be!
a good person who lives off of taxpayer money?
that is not a good person
that is a thief

Dreamer A: THIEF??

Person 1: Yes. You live off of other people's money.

Dreamer A: thief are the multi million dollars corporation that feed of the misfortune and misery of the people

Person 1: and how is what you do so different?

Dreamer A: severance pay
its pretty much

Person 1: ? Please explain to me once more

Dreamer A: half the money i paid
in taxes being in the military
i only get ten grand
for 6 months
and then, it's no more
goodnight dad
i need some rest
it is almost 2am here

Person 1: Alright son.
i love you


Person 2

I think, the main problem for you is that it's difficult for you to be
accepted in the ordinary world because you will be judged by ordinary
people and by their standards, and that includes me. I am trying to step out
from my ordinary box and see the bigger picture in you, trying to
understand what I cannot see and trying to accept and appreciate everything
who you are, even when I don't understand.

In ordinary world people are judged by what they have achieved in
understandable way: like, finished university, have good grades, got good
job, make good money, have good family, participate and give to community,
etc. There are certain expectations for certain age. For example, nobody
expects you to conquer the world by age 25, but you would be considered an
achiever if you have finished college, got a good job, became stable
emotionally and independent financially. In some countries you would be
expected to have family and children by that time, but in America you can
wait until late 30s and still be pretty much on schedule. If you didn't get
a family by 45, then the train is gone (for a girl), probably will be no
kids anymore and that would be looked by the society as a missed avenue for

I don't mean talking about you in particular. It's just any society and
people who are part of it, have certain stereotypes, rules, expectations,
etc. It's not bad by itself, because it does raise the board, sets certain
goals and stimulates people. Otherwise, it can be very confusing for young
mind to find out what to do. In general, it's well known that good education
opens door to good job and opportunities. Lots of teenagers don't even know
yet what they will be, but at least they know that they need to get good
education for the start and take it from there.

So, from general ordinary point of view, very few people can appreciate or
understand your pass now because it doesn't go in the usual logical way for
success. There is no question that the odds for success would have been
better in this world if you worked your way in the expected way, but you
chose a different way, which is hard to understand for most people and
that's why it will be difficult for you to be accepted by ordinary people.
Since you are very talented, I believe, that you will be able to achieve
what you want, but you chose more difficult and complicated way when you had
the free ticket in your hands. Many people would not understand why you
would not do what would make sense to them, like finish university, stay
close to your family, etc. Me and your dad and your whole family around the
world are ordinary people and have been confused by certain actions you took
because from our stand point they are not logical. As much as I myself don't
always understand what you do and probably don't see things the way you do,
I am accepting them and support you as long as I feel that what you do makes
you happy and doesn't hurt you. I cannot share your vision because I am an
ordinary person and don't see things happening in the way which is out of
ordinary, but I respect and admire you that you have guts to go your own
more difficult way, which probably will not work for most ordinary people,
but, I hope, will work for you. Regardless of how you will make, if at the
end of it you still will be that stable, financially secured, independent
and happy healthy person, then ordinary people will accept you too, because
they can understand and appreciate that result, but they still probably
would never understand how you pulled it through.

Anyway, I am in full support for you and your talents. I think you have
lots of great talents and abilities, which are the beautiful gifts and very
precious. You have many open roads in front of you. As long as whatever you
do makes you happy, I will be happy for you. (It would be great to make
right choices all the times, but we often don't know what is right until
thereafter. Even when we truly believe that we are making the right choice
at the moment, we still make mistakes). Who am I to judge you! I am a human
being and made lots of mistakes in my life. I don't have answers for
everything. I do have my opinions, but who said that I am right?!

I have to go to sleep now.

I love you,

Dreamer B:

a note about the ordinary people thing...
i do match the standards that most people equate with success, or at least i will by the end of this year
and in general, i don't seek approval from people
there are many people who are "not ordinary" who are very thankful for what i do and who i am
and.. what i do, helps ordinary people as well. although i don't consider anyone ordinary or non-ordinary

Person 2: you are lucky to have them around!

Dreamer B; there are many in this world, who have pushed boundaries, and have pushed the world into progress
these people were people like me
people like richard branson, da vinci, einstein
nobody understood them either
but now people benefit from their inventions and methods of thought

Person 2: i am glad that you are not looking for approval

Dreamer B: in practical terms
i know who and what i am, and i understand people most people don't get it. and i don't need them to. i'm more than enough secure with myself.
i won't stop what i do just because someone doesn't like me or understand me.
cuz i've seen, how much i help people, who don't understand me
and even if they don't know that i'm the one thats helping them , their lives have been changed, for the better, because of me
as to .... whatever happens in the future.. in many ways, i already am where i want to be
i am a success already.
being able to live, as who i am, and in accordance with what i think, is success for me.
i have many goals and things which i aspire to do,
but i'm not in limbo land, waiting to become something else.
i already am who i want to be
and i already have what i want, and live how i want

Person 2: that's wonderful!

Dreamer B: i am very thankful for how much you try to understand me, and how difficult it must be,
and that you do it out of love
i appreciate your love and support

Person 2: and that's why I am happy for you!
this is the best thing which can happen to anybody-to be satisfied and happy with who you are!

Dreamer B: =0)

Person 2: I cannot wish for anything better for my child!

Dreamer B: here is something which might explain some ideas i have for my school, there is already something like it out there:
check it out. make sure to read the part about how their average student populace: most have college or post-grad degrees, but make less than $20K, due to choice, because they move away from city populated areas to pursue peace and enlightenment.

in response to your previous comment:
It's just any society and
> people who are part of it, have certain stereotypes, rules, expectations,
> etc. It's not bad by itself, because it does raise the board, sets certain
> goals and stimulates people.

yes. it stimulates people to achieve mediocrity, and to settle for a
life which has already been lived by so many before them. to reach for
such average goals is fine, but it is sad, when so many, could achieve
so much more.

why make only "good money" when you could be a millionaire?
why have a "good job" when you could start a company that actually
creates even more Great jobs for people, and for yourself?
why only "help community" when you can help the world?
why "stay close to family", when you can be close to the world?

all these things are great starting points. you could say, until u
make money first, how can u become a millionaire?
until u have one good job, how can u be ceo?
until u know ur family, how will u know the world?

and all this is both true and not true. success and vision, is not
climbing the ladder. that is what most people choose to do , and they
are ceo's or whatever, if they have those dreams, at age 50.

Alexander, the great, ruled the entire european empire by age 25. do
you think that if he decided to go the standard route and become a
married blacksmith (common for people back then) the world would have
grown as much as it did because of his genius? no. it would have
stayed the same. success, average success, mediocre success, such as
being a lawyer, or a doctor, or a scientist, is usually achievable
through standard means, by age 35/40.

infinite success, as in establishing a worldwide company that feeds
millions, like Virgin records, or Bill Gates's Microsoft, are never
started with small goals and ideas. Bill gates is a college dropout
did u know that? einstein flunked high school.

greatness and great success, are usually not achieved by going the simple route.

most truly great figures throughout history, have always had the most
non-conformative lives. read their bios! i do!

achieving these simple targets, does not require that much effort,
which is why so many do it. but why not dream bigger? i haven't chosen
a harder path, i have chosen the only path which for me is
challenging. it is much harder for me to aim for small goals and
settle for an average life. i know i have the option, and if i fail my
dream at like 50, i'll go to uni. although, i doubt that, as i will
keep trying, even if i do fail. i'll die trying. i don't like to live
without challenge. my happiness is through challenge, through
achievement, through big dreams. i could right now get a university
degree, make a good income, and have a stable marriage. but i don't
want to settle for that, when i know i am capable of so much more. I
know how much i can help people. i already am! and i have! i have
already done what most people don't do in their entire lifetimes.

the world doesn't grow or change by mediocrity.

it changes with boldness and genius, and the people with visions who
shape the world.

if columbus had decided that he wanted to finish university, get
married, and have a great job and make good money,

nobody would even be living in america.

all people are necessary for this world to work.

and there is nothing less about being a doctor than there is about
being a dreamer. they are both equal, in what the world needs.

this is just who i am, i am a visionary. you are a doctor.

we need both.

i love you,

in practical terms:

emotional stability-in a committed relationship for 3 years
financial stability-professionally sponsored by an investor (in a business arrangement which i wrote a business proposal for).

my financial backup, after this sponsorship finishes, is
modeling, acting.

to give example, as a model, my rate, standard, is $150 per hour. that's more than a certified lawyer makes.
(most models make way higher, but i'm a beginner. to give examples,
supermodels make about $20 grand per day) and you better believe that i'm gonna make that much too! i'll keep dreaming and achieving to reach my goals!

if i have 4 days of work per week, at 5 hours a day, that is more than
enough to survive.

when i get older and won't be able to do this anymore as a backup,

i will have freelance writing as a backup.

people have offered to pay me for my essays, however i never took up the offer.

I have investments, stock, bonds, and a savings account. I'm smart about money, and I make a lot of it with very little. And the surest way to ensure financial security is to start my own company, which I am in the process of doing. And plus, my company is gonna be the first of its kind to not take advantage of people.

have u read My bio?

its on

you could say achievement, like measurable things that i have achieved:

graduating high school. not only that, but early and ahead of my class
meeting the standard of what equates "genius" -this can count as a
money-making thing, as no company would want to hire an idiot
making money with my pursuits
for example: acting-paid to be on tv
music-paid to perform
modeling-paid to model

there are more things, which u can ask me about.

i love to talk to u!

it really helps me greatly to understand what you think, what u feel,
and how other people like you feel and think. i'm not comparing you to
other people, you are your own person, i am just saying, that , it
helps and i'm thankful for it.

so please, keep telling me, how other people perceive me. including
family, people, etc. i think i have a pretty good idea, but i
always like to know more.

i love you,

Don't Like Me? Hate Me? I don't really give a shit either way! Why don't you send me an email? I get plenty of fan mail and hate mail. Maybe you'll be featured in my newsletter email section of STUPID PEOPLE:
(Or if its a collaborative email of thought-sharing, maybe you'll be featured in my GENIUSES section)

This STUPID PEOPLE Issue Features: Fred Stiplex of Wellington:

(He starts off fine for the first few emails, then he just gets STUPIDER AND STUPIDER. Sad. So Sad. Please, Observe...)

On 4/15/07, Fred Stiplex < timefo********@***.com> wrote:

Mmmmm. One of your last newsletters contained horrible,
negative and
immature comments, as did your reply to my email regarding
singing idea with the band. Regardless of the all the great
have to said, I can't take you seriously anymore. Do you
the mixed messages you send?

On 4/15/07, TheAnomalyInfinite a.k.a Liliana Alam

Hi Fred,
1. mixed messages i do understand. that is who i am. i am a
multi-version of many a thing. whilst many people are one
i am no stereotype.
2. YOU were the one who asked me to be in your band, (and as you know I already have a band, but still I gave my time to you) and i felt
i expressed a genuine interest and response. it seems you are the
who lacked serious direction. please do though enlighten me as
to what
comments i have said in response to singing for your band you
"immature, horrible, and negative."
i can't say it bothers me that you "can't take me seriously
rather that your comment is interesting and amusing, and fairly
so... i don't know how you will respond to this, seeing as you
that i give off mixed messages and so forth, but love to you,
and may
you continue to progress in the way you want to.
Va Savoir,
Liliana Alam a.k.a TheAnomalyInfinite

On 4/16/07, Fred Stiplex < timefo********@*******.com> wrote:

Come on Liliana, talking about murdering children and
cats?? Saying
(to me) "i'm gonna kill everybody one day?" This is all meant so
people can see who you really are?? What, a sadistic killer? A
version of many things?
You seem to live this persona through internet and emails. I have
across people like you before, and I too find it all very
amusing and predictable.
I genuinely wish you the very best and hope you keep inspiring
with your more positive and enlightening messages.
"Don't walk in front of me...I may not follow.
Don't walk behind me...I may not lead.
Just walk beside me and be my friend" - Anon

On 4/16/07, TheAnomalyInfinite a.k.a Liliana Alam

Fred-do you understand the meaning of a "joke", "rant", and "when
take life too seriously, it ceases to be funny." i'm sure you at
point or another were upset /angry/found something hilarious or
annoying. does that mean, that this is ALL THAT YOU ARE? no.
i am not like "any other people you have met."
i understand that you don't know me. so i wish you well. please
refrain from making judgments about things which you don't know the
full story about.
thank you for your well wishing.

On 4/16/07, Fred Stiplex < timefo********@*******.com> wrote:

Well what a great sense of humour you have! I don't believe you.
complete BS. You are just covering your foolishness. If you don't
like me
making judgments about you (rather hypocritical for you to say I might
, then don't encourage it. You are full of condractions - on one hand
commented on foul-mouthed parents then you use expletives all through
rant! What's the joke there? It really did show your immaturity
It was just a shame to see you rant like that after coming across as
with such positive and inspiring messages for people. Those things
blew me
away and was awesome to read. The world needs more of the positive and
encouraging messages and less thoughts of pain and hate. If being
multi-facted to this extent is indeed who you are, then fine, but
don't be
confused or surprised by the repsonses you get.
I actually think that the reason you do these newsletters is to get as
response as possible from as many people as possible. You want to push
the buttons you can.
You're no enigma to me.
Peace and love

On 4/16/07, TheAnomalyInfinite a.k.a Liliana Alam
<> wrote:

Well Hello Fred!

I'm not confused or surprised by the messages I receive. And Thank
You, For telling me what the world really needs. Oh, Yeah, Also, for
telling me, who I am, and stating what I am. Thanks, It how can I
say.. Really Helped, Because you see I have No Idea Who I Am, so I
depend on down-to-earth people like you to enlighten me.

I don't believe I ever once stated to you that I want you to think of
me as an enigma, or non. You drew that conclusion yourself, and seeing
as it is You, and not Me, who is so affected by what I write and/or
what I do, please, for your sake, I ask you to stop.

Glad You Think All I Want To Do Is Push People's Buttons. That makes
me so happy, because well what can I say, It's True! You really do
know me! Out of Curiosity, How many do you have? Are they blue, pink,
polka-dotted? Wow. That's Cool.

I'll be sure to keep on being as contradictive, retarded, and any
other thing which frustrates you as possible to annoy and piss you off
even more! You probably won't take my aforementioned advice, and will
keep on doing this to yourself. Make sure that you proudly proclaim to
the next lunatic you encounter, such as myself, (as your girlfriend
enlightened me as well. I feel So Loved! Wow!), that you think they
are full of bullshit. They Definitely Need It!

And I hope it comforts you to know, that I, the Bullshitter, Make More
Money Than You, Do Whatever I want Whenever I want, Have Wonderful
Friends, Have Enemies, Have Helped people across the globe some who
thank me regularly for Changing Their Lives, Have the Eternal Love of
the most Amazing man on the planet, A Slammin' (yes, that is the
expression people say about me, wow really? damn i feel so special!,
hmmm.. I wonder....) Body, Am simultaneously Enlightened and Idiotic,
Can Tie a cherry stem with my tongue in 30 seconds, and Did I mention
I'm Rich? Oh Dear, Was That Redundant? Woops. This email was fun to
write. Thank you for Giving me this Grand Opportunity.

In the words of the emperor of us all who perhaps would think I was a
pathetic fan, but thats Ok (its ok, its ok, my mommy likes me.
waaaaaaaaa. ok, ok, just don't them see you vulnerable) because you
see Hans, I am so Inspired by his Devine Message, which is:

"I Am Whatever You Say I Am, If I Wasn't, Then Why Would I Say I Am?"-
His Holiness, the Great Eminem

Love Oh Yes Love, Hate, Monkeys, Peace, Thinks that say Oink!, Chicken
Grease And Fairies,
Liliana "The Foolish, Definitely Non Enigma Who I Don't Believe",
According To Wise Fred

On 4/16/07, TheAnomalyInfinite a.k.a Liliana Alam

oooooo I almost forgot!

Damn, man, it feels so awesome to remember something when you think
you forgot it. I just love that feeling. I REALLLY do.


I recommend that your ugly girlfriend loses some weight and removes
the stick out from her ass. Are You Even Getting Any? Poor Thing, You.
Oh, and I also recommend that you improve your musical abilities, as
from what I've personally heard, You.. "Suck".

i think that was it. maybe. i'm not sure.

if i remember something else, i'll be sure to email it to you.


Bye Bye! Oh, I thought of something else. With the greatest intention
of being unoriginal and cliché,

UGLY GIRLFRIEND CAN KISS MY ASS. Make sure you deliver this message to
her! in your sad little wellington flat, You see, she very clearly
stated for me not to contact her again via myspace, which I have every
intention of complying to.

I will close with a..


and,... FUCK YOU BOTH.


I hope you both hire bouncers to beat me up (well, probably not,
seeing as you two probably couldn't afford it, in addition, if you
did, I'd really like to meet a man who can kick my ass, it would be
really nice, seeing as many such "trained athletes" are complete
PUSSIES) and bad mouth me all around Wellington! I would really,
really, love that. NO REALLY, HATE ME!! PLEASSSSEEEE!!!!!!! Can't you
see I'm fucking Desperate for Attention!!!??????

mmmmm. i think that was it. no... was it?



On 4/16/07, Fred Stiplex < timefo********@*******.com>wrote:

You take me very seriously don't you? I don't hate you Liliana, never have
and never will. You're hate and anger can't penetrate me darling.

Goof luck

From: TheAnomalyInfinite a.k.a Liliana Alam
Date: Apr 16, 2007 6:03 PM
Subject: Re:
To: Fred Stiplex

wow, you must be one of the REALLY stupid ones.

penetrate you, i wasn't trying to penetrate you, i was asking you to

how to make this more clear..hmmm...




On 4/18/07, Fred Stiplex < timefo********@*******.com> wrote:

Dear AI,

I don't wish to annoy you with my emails, so if this is unwanted please
don't reply. I always find what you have to say both fasinating and
interesting, so read your current blog entry!

I would like to engage with you again in a more productive way, if you'll
allow. I'm not put-off by our last emails.


Why is it that people seem to remember messages of negativity more than
messages of positivism? They are The Same! Hate is no worse nor better than
love. It is the action, of actually living, which matters. We are all alive.
Whether you describe some people as good or evil, they are alive regardless.
I am a multi-version of many a thing. I hope you all are smart enough to
realize that there is no difference between hate and love. That Hate Is Love
Is Life. That is the message I have been trying to explain to you all!
Everything Is Nothing. Math is Science Is Religion Is God Is Britney Spears
Is Literature Is You Is Me. If someone says, "Fuck you", why is it that you
pay more attention to it even if the very same person who said this, has
also on numerous occasions said, "I Love You"? Why do people value what is
positive over what is negative, and then Paradoxically remember what is
negative over what is positive? Try to realize, instead of separating the
good from the bad, that the good Is the bad."

I do understand what your saying, that is, there can't be Hate without Love
or Love without Hate right? Otherwise what would be Love and what would be
Hate? But then it's possible Hate alone without Love would have another
name, as with Love without Hate. So then, how do you define Love and how do
you define Hate? What are the definitions of these words? If they are one
and the same, why do they have different names?

I hope that's not confusing. I can try to clarify if so.


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: TheAnomalyInfinite a.k.a Liliana Alam
Date: Apr 18, 2007 5:56 PM
Subject: Re: From Fred :)
To: Fred Stiplex

Dear Fred,

I would love to continue communication with you. I'm happy and
interested that you have communicated with me after our shall we say
"verbal battle", or rather.... my cynical remarks, which I don't "take
back", but know their offensive/mean spirited interpretation could
have put you off. I appreciate the love you have within you. (You may
not find your email as an act or anything of love, but to me it is.
Its like, if your girlfriend yelled at you, you would not walk away,
and instead you would try to help her in some way, or just connect and
share. Anyway.... that isn't mean to freak you out or anything, I'm
just saying thank you for your connection. I was a bit sad about our
abrupt end of communication. I probably (don't know now, but just
knowing me) would have communicated with you after a while if u hadn't
done it first. And I still have some questions for you, please look for
them in my previous emails about comments you have made, which I would
like to have answered when u have some time. For example "you have
made immature comments about band involvement"-what have i said? i
feel the opposite, that i've made an effort, and it is you who first
even asked me to sing for ur band, and even though i was busy, i still
was enthusiastic and willing to take it seriously. I felt blown off by
your , what i interpreted as lack of professionalism. Please enlighten

My responses (not epic global answers, just my perceptions) to your thoughts:

I do understand what your saying, that is, there can't be Hate without Love
> or Love without Hate right?

Not necessarily. Hate can exist without love, and love can exist
without hate. It is like, peanut butter and jelly. they can exist
separately, but to understand the full mergence and explosion of
flavours, tasting them together, and in equal proportions, is the most
enlightening. (but then again, there are many who don't like peanut
butter & jelly, and that doesn't mean they are ignorant, its just a
matter of taste, metaphorically if you will) Hate does exist without
love in the world, it can be found in many places, as I'm sure you
know and have seen. So does love. What I find is that complete
obedience to either one or the other limits us from absorbing the full
beautiful and amazing, or rather "mind-boggling" value of everything.
I wouldn't say the key word is "balance", but thats probably the best
way to sum it up, if I think of another word i'll let u know.

Otherwise what would be Love and what would be
> Hate?

Yes that is true, brilliant point, the paradoxicality-is that a word?
well if it isn't i made it up-see Neologism-i learned about this word
through the inspiring Helmut Marko. Its like, how would you know what
depth is, if there were no holes? The human mind searches for
comparisons, in dealing with life's mysteries. But, scientifically
speaking, darkness does exist without light. Although darkness is an
absence of light, if there was no light, there would still be
darkness. The universe did exist before we actually knew of its
existence. A lack of nothingness, is still nothingness. So... hate can
exist without love, and vice verse. as to definitions of hate, this may
vary for many, my personal definition of hate is the following "the
conscious decision to not be vulnerable in any manner." vulnerability
is usually associated with pride, a thing which has caused many wars.
To further explain how this definition can be implied in life, I will
describe Actions of hate, or , acts which have hate as their
underlying motive. Acts of hate would be racist killings, mass
suicides, Ku Klux Klan, gay shootings, etc. I don't find hate to be a
negative or unfavourable quality. Naturally speaking, we need acts of
hate to control the populace and weed out the survivors, in order to
produce finer genetic specimens therefore progressing "life, the
experiment", itself. Acts of love would be for me, "consciously
deciding to be vulnerable, in whatever manner, and not succumbing to
the instinctual pressure of pride." Acts of love would be letting your
guard down for someone you love, changing some mannerism of yours to
make someone feel a certain way ("better"), sharing love with people
as a whole verbally or physically, sex (but sex can also be an act of
hate), sacrifice of self pleasures for the fulfillment of someone else
(but paradoxically why would this person want u to do this if They
loved you? the boundaries of hate and love betwixt...), etc. I also do
not find love to be a favourable or disfavourable thing. Love can save
people from death, medically, -healing cancer stories, etc. Which
technically goes against mother nature and therefore keeps people on
the planet far longer than is necessary to ensure the survival of the
mass populace. Each human takes up space and energy. Although energy
is transferable and changing. Anyway... Love can physically and
mentally change a person to becoming something truly "great". -Jesus.
But Too much love can blind people from progression, and also damage
any chance of survival. Sometimes love can dangerously illude hope in
masses, and actually drive them to the point of committing acts of
hate in order to ensure a constant state of love. E.g, shootings in
the name of "god and religion". hippies vs. government heads by
shooting militaristic presidents. Love and Hate are both powerful, but
they are insufficient by each other.

But then it's possible Hate alone without Love would have another
> name, as with Love without Hate. So then, how do you define Love and how do
> you define Hate? What are the definitions of these words?

read above.

If they are one
> and the same, why do they have different names?

Why do you and I have different names? We're both organisms with
blood. Or rather, why do you and your father have different names?
You're both of the same genetics pool. Classification, and
organization, is a programmed thing within the human mind. Our brains
are more powerful than any computer. Our mind take "planning and
memory" to whole new levels. So, as the human species naturally
organizes, thus is the world which they live in. But in wild non-human
nature, foxes don't have names. Animals don't look at each other as
"Joe" and "Tracy". Not because they are not different, but because
there is no self-ego perception as is found in the human. You and I
are different. But we are also the same. As are love and hate.

Looking forward to your thoughts,
Liliana the furry monkey (the last part describes my current mood)

A Note to Parents that look down upon their children, only to realize that Their Parents, Also looked down on them. Generation Gaps, What We can Do To Solve This: Love Each Other. Accept each other. Understand Each Other. Put your ego and perceptions aside and try to be open to someone else's unique experience and view of life. Everyone Thinks They're Right. So We All Are. Just Not To Each Other. Lets Change That!

I'm moving to LA sometime in Sept 2007. Anyone out there, send me an email for friendship or networking purposes:


Until Next Time......
Never Settle For Anything Less Than What You Are.
Love Everyone. Trust nobody. Rule the Universe.

I love you,
Liliana Alam a.k.a TheAnomalyInfinite