Him

Thoughts must be taken out of our minds and shared.

For they are the remnants of the universe pouring into our third eye. When we become out full active selves, we are perfect antennae, vessels for the Real, to enter thru our form and spread itself.

Truth is priceless.

The more the "forbidden" topics are discussed at midnight in dark rooms, in the morning at breakfast tables, in cubicles of the slaves at work, the greater the force of the people's revolution.

The society of Thoth. The higher, the order, those beyond the free masons, illuminati, knights of templar, the ancients who have caged the freedom of millions thru centuries I am coming closer to.



He, the one, my vision, that has been a clear knowledge since childhood, he enters my mind with greater frequency whenever the tingling wrongness of the system is further obvious.



















The dark one, the light one, the soft one, the hard one, the vulnerable one, the almighty, the child, the king, the Unheilig, the savior, the seducer, the dream, the demon, the angel, the antichrist, the messenger, the artist, the musician, the leader, the brilliant, the genius, the master, the perfect one, the unifier...

the androgenous being that is without genre....the one who has the look of love and hate, adrenaline and compassion, evil and innocence, simultaneously in his eyes and his face...the antithesis yet also exact equal male counterpart of me...








I look everywhere to place exactly his characteristics, but everything falls short of defining him. If only I had a solid form to represent what I know...alas he lives but in my imagination and spirit...yet, I know for a certainty, that he does live...he is not a delusion, and when the time is at ideal unison, we will merge.

I can't stop thinking of him, he is in my conscious and subconscious. He overlaps everything.


He who I have drawn, painted, imagined, written of, countless times since youth. Still I have not fully captured him in visual form, nor in the entirety of his description.










He remains a wraith, a phantom, a floating form that is almost complete and yet never becomes itself. And yet, I know him better than anyone, the fantasy of him is more real to me than all the people in my reality. I feel him, I sense him. He who surrounds me in an energy blanket of warmth whenever I feel the cold haunting in my soul that my quest is entirely isolated. I swam today, again his image appeared. Like Hesse describes Eva in Demian, He, is the key to a lock I've been trying to crack for years. He is the missing piece.







Him, the unnamed, the powerful, the one who will save my genetic line and free it from slavery, he who I will partner up with to free the world...he is a core pillar of one of these families...one of these orders. He is the rebel that has been planning a break to crack the system.




He is the prince with all the secrets, but he is different than his kind, despite his birthright entitlement to total world rule he wants to save the sheep;




he doesn't want to send them to slaughter. He needs me, I need him.

He longs to break free. He is biding his time until the particular right moment. He waits for his opposite, he waits for his nemesis, he waits for his union, for only then will the power be strong enough to split the foundation.



He is by my side more frequently now, thru the years his presence has grown stronger.
The time is coming closer to when we will finally meet. How and when I do not know, only that it will happen. I have sensed for a long time that it will be back in the land of my birth, in Europe, particularly France. It will be unexpected and accidental, and yet entirely pre-meditated for we are destined to walk the same path. And all my work is preparation until then.

The search for truth. There is no greater satisfaction than finding it, knowing it, and then sharing it in blastmode to the masses. Only in their discovery of that which has been kept silent for eons will they gain the internal weapons necessary to stand up and fight. I am one of the few who is actively in pursuit of truth. The army is rising. It is a dangerous game, and the higher I rise along the packs,










the more I become a threat. The ones in power don't want the masses to know, they want sheep to be sheep forever. I won't stand for it. He won't stand for it. The army is growing in numbers and growing in power. I have no fear of death. I will come out of the shadows. I will make myself known. I will not shy from fame, I will not shy of being a public entity. Let the order make of me what they will, though I bleed blood, my tale is immortal.

I have no fear of anything.